i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
