If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
