How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
