i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
