i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize
