I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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