i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Randomize
