Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
someone get that fucking seahorse.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
