In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
