It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
