four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize