Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Randomize