its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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