her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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