You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Randomize
