u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
