i barfeds in our rink
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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