when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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