i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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