So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
