So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Randomize
