Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
We left the knife in your bed.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
