I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize
