Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
