I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
