i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize