she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
These tits shall not be calmed
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize