I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
