There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize