I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Randomize
