In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Randomize
