YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
