OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
