it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize