never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
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