ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
