That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize
