God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
