I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
