Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize
