What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
