My nipple is on Facebook.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
The cops high fived after they tackled you
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
