Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
