we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
