No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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