People with herpes should wear stickers.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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