love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Randomize