No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize