She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
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