Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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