Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
