I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
tell me about the eggs
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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