I heard we made out
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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